Aug 5, 2014

Reflecting

A friend of mine Emily just had a precious little girl last week - Congratulations again!

It got me thinking about when I was pregnant with Persephone and then those first few days, weeks and months after her birth.  We had to immediately adapt to this new life and schedule.  I've wondered if women who schedule their deliveries have it any easier?!

When I went in for my 37 week check up, I was feeling perfect. Blood pressure was a little elevated and I was 4cm dilated, but essentially felt just fine.  Two days later I was feeling weird at work, not bad or in pain...just a lot of pressure on my pelvis when I stood up.  I went in to have the doctor check me out and I had bumped up to 5cm and he sent me to the hospital.  Our house was a mess, I hadn't worked out all of the details on our "maternity budget".  I really hadn't even finished my work either.  I guess that's when I realized it was officially no longer about "me" or "us"...it's about Persephone.

But who could deny this sweet face anything?



If she's not feeling well, we try to stay home and just relax.  If something is planned around her nap time, we try and work it so that she's able to nap ahead of time.  It's not always convenient or when we would like to get stuff done, but I hate seeing babies and young children acting out in public...most of them are really brats, but a lot of them don't want to be wherever they are.

They don't want to be at Chili's when they're 2hrs past nap time.  They don't want to be pushed in a buggy around Target when they have a fever.  I realize some of these things are unavoidable, but we as a couple try to make things as easy as possible on her.  

Cause if baby aint happy, aint nobody happy....


I had a really rough start to motherhood.  I didn't have a horrific delivery or healing process.  But I was taken aback by the emotional change.  I was trying to breastfeed, trying to adjust to this new schedule and life.  While books, peers and family can help prepare you for life with a baby, nothing and no one can actually prepare you for the emotions.  The hospital experience seems like such a blur to me now.  I'm checked in, water breaks, baby's here, people visit, no sleep, biliblanket, no sleep, go home, scared to go to sleep,she has jaundice - she's admitted back into hospital for 24hrs, go home for the second time, scared to sleep, tired, can't figure out breastfeeding...the story goes on.  I was SO intimidated by this little person.





Persephone will be 2yrs old next month.  She's at such a fun age now.  Talking, learning, experiencing, copying, eating, maneuvering....it's amazing to see her grow.  Still at times, I find myself missing the little baby she once was.  The sack of potatoes swaddled in a blanket that only ate, pooped, peed and slept.  I know WHAT we did pre-Persephone, but I wouldn't trade her for all of that any day.  I love our baby more and more every day even if she's growing up on us.

On August 3, 2012, I was 31 weeks preggers

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